But like every other aspect of his term, Bill de Blasio was once again a hype girl, and made New Yorkers look like a bunch of wussies that can't weather a few inches of snow. However, I still took advantage of the snow day, making the trek up to CP so I could take the perfect basic betch photo of the views from the boat basin and Sheeps Meadow. I even had had a Starbucks in my hand, a cigarette, Ray-Ban mirrored lens glasses, and a hot pink beanie on. I was one Instagram-of-Uggs-in-the-snow-away form actually becoming a basic betch.
It was fucking freezing, and I kept expecting to see Kim Kardashian prancing around in her furkini. I'll take any excuse to hashtag "boots with the fur," but why would she wear a merkin for her 25 million followers, and WHY HAS NO ONE MENTIONED THIS YET?!
mer·kin: noun \ˈmərkə̇n\ An artificial covering of hair for the pubic hair. AKA a pubic wig.
Oh by the way, I'm writing again.